Autistics Building Community & Friendships Free Version

Transcript

Autistics Building Community & Friendships

May 10th, 2026

Episode Introduction and Preview

Welcome to Today’s Autistic Moment: A Podcast for Autistic Adults by An Autistic Adult. My name is Philip King-Lowe. I am the owner, producer and host and I am an Autistic Adult. Thank you so very much for listening.

Gaby San Miguel is my guest for this show and is a graduate from Minnesota Independence College & Community. Gaby will highlight her experiences at various educational institutions before she attended MICC. Gaby found opportunities to build community and strong friendships through her involvement with MICC’s mindful activities, seasonal excursions, and the ambassador’s class that helped her prepare to be our guest today.

Come join us for the episode Autistics Building Community & Friendships on Today’s Autistic Moment.

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Segment 1

This first segment of Today’s Autistic Moment is sponsored by The Autism Society of Minnesota, known as AuSM throughout Minnesota’s Autism Community. As Minnesota’s First Autism Resource for more than 50 years, AuSM serves the whole state, the whole spectrum for the whole life. Visit AuSM at ausm.org.

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Coming up after the first commercial break, Gaby San Miguel and I will present Autistics Building Community & Friendships on Today’s Autistic Moment.

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Commercial Break I

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Segment 2

Gaby San Miguel is a 2021 MICC graduate. Gaby still lives near the MICC Campus with a roommate and works for Crayola Experience. Gaby is involved in MICC activities and excursions, including ambassador class where she learns to represent MICC to new audiences conduct tours and is at events. Gaby also participates in additional social groups like Best Buddies and Adventures with Friends.

Please join me as I welcome Gaby San Miguel.

Philip King-Lowe 

Gaby San Miguel, welcome to Today's Autistic Moment. Thank you very much for being here today.

Gaby San Miguel

Thank you for having me.

Philip King-Lowe 

You're welcome. Welcome, especially to you as part of Minnesota Independence College & Community, and we're going to talk about how Autistics thrive through community building and friendships. So let's begin, Gaby, please introduce yourself and talk about how you are thriving through community building and friendships you have found at MICC.

Gaby San Miguel 

Okay, so hi, my name is Gaby, and I'm part of MICC. I've been able to thrive through community building and friendships here, especially in ways that I didn't I didn't think I'd be able to experience.

Philip King-Lowe 

Yeah. What was community and friendships like before you attended MICC, and how are they different now?

Gaby San Miguel 

So before MICC, especially in elementary school, I felt pretty isolated and didn't have many strong friendships. And then I went to the Franklin Center, which was a little better. I started making some friends there, but when I came to MICC, that's where I really found my community. I felt more accepted, and it became easier to connect with people who have probably been in the same shoes as I have.

Philip King-Lowe 

What was different about each place?

Gaby San Miguel

So in elementary school, I had trouble, like, kind of making social connections. So that meant I pretty much had no friends to play with at recess or sit with at lunch. And then when I went to Franklin center, that kind of changed. It was like a really small, oh, another thing I wanted to add in elementary school, I would work when it came to school, work like I would sit in a room full of children like my age, but I had a paraprofessional like holding my hand and helping me with my schoolwork, and that didn't make me really feel good. So well when I got to Franklin center. Actually, both of those environments changed. So Franklin center was pretty small, and I met, like a lot of kids that were probably in the same situation as me, so social connections, because it was a smaller environment, it was easy to make those connections. And then when it came to school work, we would all get divided in like groups, like depending on our like, our learning level. And so we all got to work independently, too, with a little help from one teacher. And then as for MICC, so obviously the school environment was different, like, especially with living alone on campus. And then as for the freshman classes, it really wasn't a one size fits all, like the freshman classes, like everybody can start at the at a different time of their life, like it's not the 18 years old that you start immediately. So I got to when I first came here, I met people who were my age, some were a bit older. And then we as for classes. So there were some classes where people in your grade would participate, and then we had electives, which are like some classes that we get to pick of our choice, and at that place, when you when you get the electives, you will meet more people in different grade levels.

Philip King-Lowe 

Was there something your friend said that led you to consider MICC?

Gaby San Miguel 

I think I actually saw him in a video of him sharing his story at MICC, sharing all the cool things he got to learn while becoming independent and all the fun things that they get to do.

Philip King-Lowe 

What led you to tour and ultimately apply? What were you looking for that you couldn't find elsewhere?

Gaby San Miguel 

Well, I knew that there's no way that I would succeed in a transition program. So when I went to tour MICC, I saw, like a lot of people, like socializing in the student center, and even in the apartments, they weren't like that, like those small dorm rooms, and they didn't have the bathroom to you, where you had to, like, walk out in the freezing cold. So that was nice that they had those all included in the apartments. And even with some skills that you could still need support with, like cooking and cleaning and doing laundry, MICC will provide that stuff for you. And then, as you keep learning, so you have independent courses like on your schedule where you'd meet you and your roommates would have that at least twice a week. But then I think as you get the hang of it, you're kind of on your own for laundry and even grocery shopping, and as for the cleaning and cooking staff would possibly come and check and check on that?

Philip King-Lowe 

Yeah, how did you start building community and finding those friendships at MICC?

Gaby San Miguel 

I started making those connections. Like, making small talk with people about, like, Hey, what are you into? What are you doing this evening? And do you want to watch a movie? Hey, there's a social going on. Do you want to come join me? So with our socials, when you find people there, you'll probably get to find people that like to do the same things as you.

Philip King-Lowe 

Right. What was living with other people like in college and after college, who did you live with and what skills did you learn?

Gaby San Miguel 

So I had three roommates, my freshman year, it was very dynamic, fun, but also it can be dynamic at first, like, Yeah, you get to learn, like, their personalities, their skills of independence and kind of what you can bring to the table and stuff like that. And also we had apartment circle, so if we're having problems in our apartment, we would sit with a staff member, like once a week, and we'd kind of get to talk about, like, the positives and kind of what needs some tweaking and stuff like that.

Philip King-Lowe 

What were some of those conversations, like in those groups. I mean, can you describe some of those a little more?

Gaby San Miguel 

There were some conversations where, when you have those conversations, you got to be open to some feedback, and not in that, she said, she said, sort of mode. Like you have to be willing to listen to other people voice their opinions, because you want them to do the same to you.

Gaby San Miguel

So I'm still living on colony with a roommate, of course, and it's just one roommate that's from my experience, three is a crowd. So it's kind of even though we can still have our differences, but it's still pretty chill. And like I said, even though we do have our differences, it's nice to have somebody come hang out with you and watch a movie every night.

Philip King-Lowe 

Talk about how mindfulness, yoga, diamond painting, coloring apps helped you with your self-care.

Gaby San Miguel

So when I first came to MICC, I was feeling so many emotions at a time, but finding those like mindfulness activities like really helped me. So yoga was actually an elective of interest that I could sign up for. So that was nice to carve some mindfulness. And then, as for the happy color and diamond painting, it became like a trend, like everybody was doing it. So I kind of hopped on the bandwagon. And not only did it, did it help me with my stress, but it also helped me make some new friends, like people I actually didn't think I'd be close with.

Philip King-Lowe 

Was your finger painting kind of like a stem for you? That kind of help relax your mind and that sort of thing?

Gaby San Miguel

Yes, the diamond painting?

Philip King-Lowe 

Yeah, it's okay, sorry. Diamond painting. I had my own experience one time where I was in a place where that where I was feeling a lot of sensory, sensory stress, and so I found a table where I could just trace this line on it. And sounds so relaxing, yeah, that's just tracing that line on a table just helped me just kind of calm down, cool down. Yeah. So I would think that, you know, diamond painting is like, you get to, you know, do this, and it's kind of like, kind of the same kind of thing by, you know, focusing on this color in the spot, it kind of release your mind just a little bit, yeah.

Gaby San Miguel 

And this is why I'm when I do go on the coloring app, I prefer to just do, do the number colors in order, instead of just add a custom order.

Philip King-Lowe 

Yeah, I do some of that myself. You know? It just helps me just color an area that makes you feel like you're creating something, and also just kind of getting some of that sensory stress out of your system, yeah, so you look at something different and see color coming in and just kind of following it until it's made, yeah.

Gaby San Miguel 

Not only that, it could also bring some brightness to your days.

Philip King-Lowe

After this next commercial break, Gaby will talk about seasonal excursions and the ambassador’s class. 

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Segment 3

Welcome back. Before the commercial break, Gaby San Miguel told us about her experiences with various educational programs. Gaby shared how she discovered MICC and how it changed her life so she could participate in community building and find strong friendships.  Now we are going to talk about MICC’s seasonal excursions and the diversity of the students at MICC.

Philip King-Lowe 

Well, I've heard that MICC has seasonal excursions, so tell us a little bit about that?

Gaby San Miguel

Yeah, so basically, like every season, like winter, spring, summer, fall, we get the options to sign up for electives. So recently, for one of with those excursions, you do kind of have to be open to meeting new people, because you can't really see who's signing up for them. But also, since I've made friends like coming here, I always text them like, you know, hey. Excursions are coming out. Which ones are you thinking about doing? So?

Philip King-Lowe 

Do you have some of your any favorites that come to mind?

Gaby San Miguel

So recently, we've gone to Comedy Sports. That was a fun one. As a matter of fact, somebody in our group actually got to participate like a guest. And then I know for summer, we've got a couple like Valley Fair, the Water Park, think it's Cascade Bay in downtown Northfield.

Philip King-Lowe 

Now, talk about the ambassador's class. Talk about how the ambassador's class helps you build community.

Gaby San Miguel

So with the ambassador's class, not only have I made friends in that class, but also you get to make connections with people that are also interested in coming into MICC. So actually, as a matter of fact, Andrea, she emailed me some feedback. So about a few days ago, we had a prospective student touring the campus. And at first they were not really sure if they felt like coming here. But then, when I met with them, and they actually we found a common interest. Taylor Swift, actually, when they ended up leaving, they started like, Oh, I could see myself here, or something.

Philip King-Lowe 

What sorts of things do you discuss in the ambassador's class? Is there anything specific you'd like to help give the audience a little bit more.

Gaby San Miguel

So what we do in ambassador's class, so we kind of talk about, like being role models and at MICC and touring, how we can help with tours with new people and events that kind of that show us that we have a voice for MICC and we advocate for people to come here.

Philip King-Lowe 

And I see that you also talk about, you know how to deal with things like homesickness and talking to advisors and that sort of thing. Yeah. Can you elaborate on that?

Gaby San Miguel

Yeah, so for me, when, actually, when I was a senior, my first for my display, so we do a senior spotlight, and everyone that's graduating gets to have their display. So when I had my display, I had, like, a huge collage of pictures of me with some what a little questionnaire that I did, and one of them is always like, what's some advice that you have for people that are coming to MICC? And I was like, you know, the first year can always be a little hard, but you will eventually navigate your way.

Philip King-Lowe 

How have you built community and friendships among the diversity that is part of MICC?

Gaby San Miguel 

Well, it has taught me that it's okay to be different. It's okay to have, like all friends come in different shapes and sizes, and like those people, they're, they're human beings like us. I mean, they also came to MICC for a reason too, right? And it's not to be there for, don't choose to be their friends, like, out of guilt, but to have that open mind and like, expand your friendship circle. You can show that diversity really is included in that.

Philip King-Lowe 

Yeah, yeah. I appreciate that you mentioned being authentic into friendships and, you know, seeking them out because of who they are, not because of because that's important. We don't want, you know, what we call, "conditional acceptance." We want, you know, real acceptance and a genuine acceptance.

Gaby San Miguel 

And that's what MICC is all about. And, but being an ambassador is too.

Philip King-Lowe 

And, and then there's the diversity of Neurodivergence, which is very, very important. And how do you and other participants at MICC get to know each other and support each other's needs when they're all so different?

Gaby San Miguel 

So I actually like the word Neurodivergent like at MICC, because not everybody that comes to MICC has Autism. They could also have different sensory or learning needs, um, if they can kind of learn that when you are especially living with someone, like, you want to be mindful, like you don't never know what the what somebody is going through and something like that. Whether it's like a tough time or just something in their life that they just can't seek to control.

Philip King-Lowe 

And each Neurodivergent person is going to have, as you pointed out, different sensory needs. They're going to have lots of other needs that you know, you may or may not be aware of. And you know, incidentally, Neurodivergence, that umbrella is forever expanding. The day is really here when the Neurodivergent communities are going in the same direction as the LGBTQ communities, as in being the community of alphabet soup. So, you know, we have Autistics, ADHD or Dyslexics and that sort of thing. So there's lots and lots of differences. And what we do know is that many Autistics are multiply Neurodivergent, which mean, you know, they're Autistic, or as AuDHD, Autistic, Autistic and ADHD and lots of other things.

Philip King-Lowe

Coming up after this next commercial break, Gaby will tell us more about herself and her background and more about her experience at MICC.  Today’s Autistic Community Bulletin Board will follow.

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Future Shows

On May 24th, Lisa Morgan and I will present Autistics Finding Themselves.  If you have suffered the loss of someone you love, a job, a pet or just found out that you are Autistic, you will go through various stages of grief. Things are no longer the way they were, including your own sense of who you are. Lisa Morgan will join me as we validate the experiences of Autistics as they grieve and find themselves, using their strengths to thrive and move forward.

On June 14th, Coach Lee Hopkins will return to Today’s Autistic Moment for the episode Proud Autistic & Queer.

On June 28th, Hilary Otey and Coda Brucki from Queermunity will be my guests to talk about Maintaining Safe Autistic Queer Spaces.

Thank you for listening to Today’s Autistic Moment.

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Segment 4

Philip King-Lowe

Talk about your own background. You were born in Puerto Rico, then lived in Florida and that sort of thing. Tell us a little bit about that.

Gaby San Miguel

So yes, my family was Spanish speaking. I actually spoke it before I spoke English. However, I did kind of lose the spark. But I think now my brother and sister, they kind of know what a little bit better than I do, because they went to a Spanish Immersion School. It's a matter of fact, I think my brother, who recently went to Spain for a spring break on what friends got, kind of perfect of that when he went

Philip King-Lowe 

And your time at MICC has that strengthened your acceptance of both your own Neurodivergence And also, did you find that they really did embrace your differences too?

Gabby San Miguel

What do you mean by that?

Philip King-Lowe 

There's a path that one goes through to accept one's Neurodivergence, you know, Autistic and whatever else. But then there's also the place where your own culture, your own Spanish speaking culture, found a home at MICC where you were clearly accepted, respected and, you know, you didn't feel like had to measure up to any one group of people. Do you know I understand what I mean?

Gabby San Miguel

So, I think there was, like a list. It was kind of like a little personality test, and you kind of get to check the boxes like of which one could mark you the best. And you never know. Some people, they can be just like you some they can be different, and that's totally okay.

Philip King-Lowe 

And MICC has that atmosphere where you know, you can find that acceptance, you know, and really, you know, see opportunities to learn, and yeah, and all that. And, you know, mingle with other what we call intersectional identities that is so very important.

Philip King-Lowe 

Talk about some other communities you work at Crayola Experience with another MICC participant?

Gabby San Miguel 

Yes, so act funny enough. So when I first started at Crayola, there wasn't another MICC there was an MICC participant that used to work there. And so when that recent person from MICC came to work with me. It was really nice to have somebody in my community to work with again, and also kind of getting to show them the ropes as well.

Philip King-Lowe 

Yeah. You also participate in Best Buddies and meet regularly with someone you are matched with, and you attend adventures with friends twice per month and activities and outings?

Gabby San Miguel 

Yes. So, I love these because they're like, a great opportunity to connect with people like even outside of MICC, so with Best Buddies a couple weeks ago, like, two weeks ago. So my buddy and I, we tried to get together, like, at least every other week. I think, last time we hung out, we she picked me up at the mall, like after work, and then we just grabbed a bite to eat, and then we walked around, and we went to this really cute duck arcade. It's really cute, by the way. And then as for adventures with friends, so like two weeks ago, like on the first week of the month, we recently went bowling, and actually, this Sunday, we're gonna go to dinner and a movie.

Philip King-Lowe 

Are there any other activities that you've done?

Gabby San Miguel

So, what adventure with friends? We've also we've went to the we saw the Harlem Globe Trotters, live week, walk on to Color Me mind. We've gone to Sam's Christmas Village, and we do all sorts of fun things.

Philip King-Lowe 

Well, Gaby, thank you for being on this episode of Today's Autistic Moment and sharing your stories. That's always very important and..

Gabby San Miguel 

Of course, thank you for having me.

Philip King-Lowe 

You're welcome. You're welcome.

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The Steps for Autism will take place on May 17th, 2026, beginning at 9am to 12noon at The Roc at the St. Louis Park Rec Center located at 3700 Monterey Drive, St. Louis Park, MN 55416. This is an outdoor event in the covered hockey rink behind the Rec Center. There will be fun and inclusive events, a resource fair, a flash dash and sensory walk, costumed characters and community building opportunities.

The Adult Coffee Club for Autistic Adults in Minnesota are held on the second Tuesday of every month (weather permitting) at Dogwood Coffee located at 2700 University Ave W. Suite 100 in St. Paul, Minnesota. The Zip Code for your GPS is 55114. The Adult Coffee Clubs will begin at 3:00pm to 5:00pm on May 12th. June 9th. July 14th. August 11th. September 8th. October 13th. November 10th. December 8th.

Understanding Autism virtual classes are offered by The Autism Society of Minnesota. The next classes will be May 11th, 12-1pm. June 8th, 6-7pm. July 13th, 10-11am. August 10th, 12-1pm. September 14th, 6-7pm. October 12th, 10-11am. November 9th, 12-1pm. December 14th, 6-7pm.

On Thursday, June 11th, beginning at 9am to 12pm, Dr. Barb Luskin will present the workshop at The Autism Society of Minnesota entitled, Supporting Autistic People with Higher Support Needs: Tools for Communication, Choice, and Quality of Life.

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Go to ausm.org to the Education menu option to download the Summer Programs Catalog 2026 to learn more about these and other social and recreational programs, educational events, counseling services and support groups at The Autism Society of Minnesota.

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